A Letter to the Editor:
While I support the Guardian for it's drive against domestic violence as in
its recent
story (11/27/03) I have to wonder why the paper refuses to look at the real
facts instead of perpetrating the myths and the false figures which are used
to constantly undermine the help that both male and elderly victims need.
The question I need to ask the Guardian is: Why? I cannot believe that the
reporter who wrote the piece below has not actually checked out these
figures or even thought a little more deeply about them that appears to be
the case here.
Lets take these "facts" one by one.
"Up to one woman in four is affected by domestic violence at some stage in
their life."
Where does this figure come from? It certainly does not come from any
domestic violence study ever done in this country unless it was one carried
out by the notorious Betsy Stanko, who uses appalling methodology and
dubious sources for her information. In fact, the only large scale domestic
violence study carried out in the UK (HOS 191) was in 1996. That study found
that 4.2% of men and 4.2% of women suffer domestic violence. All the other
studies usually reported by sections of the press, politicians and women's
groups, rely on reported crime figures. The problem with reported crime
figures is that they are not studies of domestic violence, they are studies
of reported crimes. If women's groups had relied on reported crime figures
in the 1960`s they would never had received any recognition of the problem
they faced from brutal husbands because women back then did not report their
abuse, as men do not report their abuse today.
"More than 500,000 women are affected each year."
This is yet another inaccurate figure. If we rely on the largest domestic
survey ever carried out in Gt. Britain instead of the unreliable reported
crime figures then the figure that is most accurate is closer to 3.3 million
women suffering domestic violence every year. However, 3.3 million men also
suffer according to that study.
"Domestic violence results in the murder of more than a hundred women each
year."
This figure may well be accurate for women. However, no one really knows how
many men are murdered in this country by their wives because the police do
not keep accurate statistics on the matter. Women who employ hit men to kill
their husbands, or get family members or friends to it for them do not
appear in the domestic violence statistics. Also, females often use poison
to kill which is difficult to detect. Furthermore, a woman who kills a man
these days need only claim he abused her and she is almost certain to get
off in court. This fact alone should deeply worry any man thinking of going
out with a woman who shows even the slightest sign of being a little
unstable. If she kills you and claims abuse then it will be your family name
that is shamed and not hers. You will be too dead to defend yourself. It
will be her claimed abuse that appears in the domestic violence figures and
not yours!
"Violence within same sex relationships and from women to men is not unheard
of, but the vast majority of domestic violence (estimated at over 80%) is
perpetrated by men on women."
This is another "factoid" that is totally misleading and utterly false. In
fact, lesbian on lesbian violence occurs statistically more often than any
other form of domestic violence. The statement that "the vast majority of
domestic violence (estimated at over 80% .... Estimated by whom and on what
research? ED) is perpetrated by men on women" is a lie. What is more, I
suspect that either the reporter who wrote this knows it is a lie or is
disturbingly short on knowledge of this subject.
"The police receive an estimated 360,000 999 phone calls each year connected
with domestic violence by men against women."
In my own survey of 400 men who called my help line over a six month period
(Mine is just one help line for men out of many) I found that 74% reported
that the police refused to act or charge the female perpetrator when they
suffered domestic abuse. In some cases the police openly laughed at men
calling them for help. In other cases they police arrested the victims. In
one particularly horrendous case they failed to act even after the female
ran the man over in her car before reversing back over him. Two weeks later
she poured a kettle of boiling water over his head in front of several
witnesses and a few weeks after that incident he was found hanging in his
home. With police attitudes like this it is impossible to say how many male
victims call the police each year because there is a concerted effort by the
boys in blue to ignore male victims. This is an attitude that can only be
political in its nature. If it is not political then the Home Secretary
should be acting swiftly to end this prejudice within the police force under
his control.
"Domestic violence occurs across all ages, ethnic groups and social
classes."
While this "factoid" is almost correct it is missing one vital piece of
information and one has to wonder why. The "factoid" would become a fact if
it said: Domestic violence occurs across all ages, ethnic groups, GENDERS
and social classes.
"54,000 women and children are given protection in refuges each year."
About 4 men are given protection in refuges each year because the government
refuses to fund a single refuge for men. Instead they spend over 28 million
pounds per year on female refuges and nothing at all for male victims. This
reveals the extent of the prejudice against male victims in this government
and shows appalling double standards. If they really do care about abuse,
why do they not care about ALL abuse victims? Do 50% of the population not
matter? Instead, the governments answer to my questions concerning the
absence of refuges for men is that males can go to hostels. When I asked if
the government felt that sending a man, who may have left the home with a
couple of frightened kids, to a hostel full of homeless people, drunks and
drug addicts and run by people with no knowledge of, or expertise in
domestic abuse was appropriate, there was a deafening silence. Surely this
cannot be because there is an anti male agenda at work, can it? There are
also other facts that need to be taken into account. For example. A women I
know who once ran a refuge for women in Kent told me that "refuge hopping"
is common and that some women move from refuge to refuge yet each refuge
will book her in as a unique victim. On the Kilroy show recently (last week)
I saw a women say she entered a battered womens refuge because she was
homeless. Unless we know how common these things are we cannot accurately
know how close this figure is to reality.
"Despite the number of incidents reported, according to the latest figures
prosecutions undertaken by the Crown Prosecution Service only numbered
13,000."
This "factoid" which aims to frighten us all and is probably appearing here
to prepare us for the next set of draconian laws being made ready to go
before parliament, is actually nothing to worry about too much. If we look
at the number of reported crimes in almost any area of crime and then check
the prosecution figures for those areas we would find this trend repeated
right across the board. Sometimes, even reported domestic violence has no
basis in either fact or enough evidence to continue on to court. Many
domestic violence calls to the police are spurious and unnecessary. What the
government wants to bring into law is a situation where a simple allegation
is enough to put a man in jail and remove him from his home and kids. As we
are already seeing in family court actions, many women are spiteful enough
to deprive a father of seeing his children (Another form of both adult and
child abuse) simply because they want revenge for a relationship break up.
Imagine what women like these will do if such legislation is allowed to pass
through parliament!
"This number represents only about 15% of the estimated arrests in suspected
cases of domestic violence."
Could this be because only 15% of the arrests actually warrant further
action?
"Disabled women are twice as likely to suffer domestic violence and more
likely to endure abuse."
I would like to know the source of the study that revealed this "factoid" if
indeed it is one. Unattributed remarks like this are not helpful unless they
can be checked. Given the inaccuracy of the rest of this report I am
inclined to treat this statement with a huge pinch of salt until it can be
shown where this figure came from.
The Guardian is, in my view, being totally disingenuous in the manner in
which they report domestic violence generally and certainly in this
instance. For a journalist or an editor to allow these inaccurate "factoids"
to replace reality is not only a dereliction of their duty to research and
print the truth, it also amounts to a concerted effort to mislead the
British people. In terms of the effects on male and elderly victims of abuse
it amounts to a despicable parody of the painful, fear ridden and soul
destroying abuse that is really going on behind closed doors in this land.
Any newspaper printing these false stories should be thoroughly ashamed of
themselves and any reporter too lazy to discover the real truth about
domestic violence should be fired for gross negligence and incompetence.
Domestic abuse is wrong.......Full stop! The gender of the victim is not
what is important and niether are the figures important either. What IS
important is that we treat ALL victims of domestic violence with compassion
and an equal level of care. That this government and sections of the press
seem unable to do that is something we all must concider before we offer
them our patronage or votes.
George Rolph is webmaster of
Man2Man
